hhahahahaa!!!!! OMG!

MY GOD... well, you've got me reading alright. hahaha...
Mmm... Generally, i think you have a short attention span. VERY SHORT XAIRYLLE. hahaha... judging from the way you write, you want to get down to it as swiftly and as exciting as you possibly can.
I LIKE THAT. Since im such an impatient person myself. :P

Onyx eyes was so sad. It was so unbelieveably sad and far into a future where they've all matured exceptionally.
Yet, you tell it like you've seen everything pass.
As if everything from up to the "second time they met" had happened so long ago and you could just tell Sakura was tired of recalling it again and again.
As if the memories were laced with much exhaustion.

But i like the brief descriptions of what happened to Sasuke in that long span of time.

The lack of description was both leaving me wanting more, but at the same time was essential for the pacing and mood of the story. Which means it is best left untouched. Makes things more natural. :P

The smile... that was my favorite... the part where Sakura was taking bits from her memory and she mentions the first time he smiles...

My heart breaks, shatters into a million shards and regroups.

HAHA... senti sentimental me. :P
Good job on it.

And then the game show... OH MAN!!!! I was LAUGHING so freakin hard alone in my room! I think im starting to scare my neighbors, the characters were all so much like themselves. Especially Gai and the way he's cheering for lee (wonders silently why neji and tenten werent around for moral support)
And then what naruto did when he was cheering. Hahaha! sooo like him.
And of course, Itachi and his candid indifference and Sasuke with his raging temper.

Their nicknames were sooo hilarious!!!!
Mr. ITACHI????!!! what the helll.... DAR!
And when Gai shouts GO LEE and it totally wrecks the secret identity. BWAAHAHA
That's so Gai!!!! Dumbass.
And of course Sasuke's nickname... hahahaha... and when he smashes down the cubicle and screams "Im an AVENGEEEEERRR!!!!"
I was laughing so bad, Xairylle. Seriously. You bad girl, you give me gastrointeritis.

Lee was his usual self, and Kakashi came to life when he said "were you saying something gai?"
hahahaha!

.... I actually have the same theory about Itachi and Sasuke. The competition i mean and the wanting to push the boy to hate more and more... through HER.
If you think this is your worse fic... YOURE WRONG. (shakes you hard and shrieks)
I think its soo cute... i love it!!!!!

As for the Sasuke's first kiss... OH OH... i really like how he was so shy and how he kept disappearing looking ridiculous. (and hot) hahaha.... or cool. (shrugs)
Anyway, yeah... i really like this too. I like how the rivalry is still going on between them. Naruto as always, in defense of the girl he loves, and Sasuke... being Sasuke, (GAR sooo much damn pride on you boi)
But i like how Sasuke has an inner him too.
And the part where Sakura dashes out "I didnt see i didnt see anything sasuke-kun."

That being flustered and everything... that is a lot like how she would react, methinks!!!!

These are my favorites actually. :P

-Angie trust_downfall
 

I like the way you write... its direct and to the point, its spontaneous, witty and very simple. Hmm... a better word would be PRACTICAL. You just jump right into the nitty gritty, you parallel the thoughts with italics and everything is still smooth sailing.

Good job, hun. You have the makings of a good story-teller, much imagination and all. (or.,.. neeeehhh a commentator) MAHAHAHA.
Xairylle: yes... and the tensai-genius is now stepping up to the field and what is this? is that a katon: houssenka no jutsu? Its the seal of the tiger. it must be: gasp! No! He's down hes DOOWNN the blonde idiot dressed in stupid orange garb is DOWN!!! Stay tuned folks... stay tuned for cursed seal level two and revenge of the released kyuubi!

hahaha....
But really, i'm proud of you.
Hounto hounto sugeh na!

... mah, Jia na!

:P

-still Angie trust_downfall